Dear Leo,
I tried going back to normal after you left us, but the truth is, things will never be the same. I will not be the same. I need to find a 'new normal', a place where I feel comfortable and a place where I can live happily, despite the fact that you weren't able to live.
I am faced with many tough choices lately. Should I be just as friendly to those who have let me down during the hardest period of my life? These friends that I have, who haven't called me to ask me how I am, who haven't sent flowers nor a note. Who haven't even said a few comforting words. Should I keep them around? Or should I distance myself? I feel so hurt by their actions, or lack thereof. I know that many just don't know how to act, but all I wanted was for them to be good friends.
What should I do with family members who have disappointed me? Of course I don't want to distance myself from family, but I don't know if I can just let this go. Why haven't some family members called me yet. It's been over 2 months that you passed away. Why have they been calling my parents or in-laws instead of my husband and I? How can they send me Christmas cards with the pictures of their kids and babies on it, knowing that I'm spending a Christmas mourning my baby?
I can't go back to normal after all this. Things will forever be different.
I tried going back to normal after you left us, but the truth is, things will never be the same. I will not be the same. I need to find a 'new normal', a place where I feel comfortable and a place where I can live happily, despite the fact that you weren't able to live.
I am faced with many tough choices lately. Should I be just as friendly to those who have let me down during the hardest period of my life? These friends that I have, who haven't called me to ask me how I am, who haven't sent flowers nor a note. Who haven't even said a few comforting words. Should I keep them around? Or should I distance myself? I feel so hurt by their actions, or lack thereof. I know that many just don't know how to act, but all I wanted was for them to be good friends.
What should I do with family members who have disappointed me? Of course I don't want to distance myself from family, but I don't know if I can just let this go. Why haven't some family members called me yet. It's been over 2 months that you passed away. Why have they been calling my parents or in-laws instead of my husband and I? How can they send me Christmas cards with the pictures of their kids and babies on it, knowing that I'm spending a Christmas mourning my baby?
I can't go back to normal after all this. Things will forever be different.
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